Help! Dating in Your 40s is Scary and Nobody Taught Me How to Date

“Help! I don’t know how to date! I think love seems to be eluding me because I don’t know how to date.” If that sounds like you, you are not alone. 

So many women come to me and say, “Dating in your 40s is scary and nobody taught me how. I don’t know how to date. Nobody ever taught me how to date.” The truth is gonna set you free on this. Nobody ever learned how to date. Parents rarely if ever sit their children down and teach them how to date. In fact, many people only received vague threats such as: “Be home by nine or I’m going to get the baseball bat on that son of a bitch.” Or some unhelpful nonsense about, “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. 

In your 20s and 30s, the most you ever did was check in with your girlfriends in college or at your job to make sure they were safe or have a bit of a gossip session and giggle. But nobody ever taught us how to date. College kids right now are doing the exact same thing and nobody’s ever offered a Dating 101 class. Nobody was taught how to date. 

You’re not alone.

Accomplished women who, like you, are thriving in their careers and achievements are coming to me and saying they do not know how to date. Women who are divorced, or who had a long term partner, or feel like they haven’t even been in the type of incredible relationship that they want, often feel this way. They feel like they don’t know how to date, because nobody ever taught them.

Dating in Your 40s is Scary and Nobody Taught Me How

Help! Dating in Your 40s is Scary and Nobody Taught Me How to Date

You are not behind or missing out on something that everyone else already has or knows.

Nobody is given a manual. Everybody you know is just trying to cobble together what they know, while they’re trying to rework trauma, undo conditioning, heal generational trauma and family curses, unlearn lousy advice, and overturn the patriarchy. We’re all trying to figure it out as we go.

Let’s meet each other there. You and everyone else you have probably ever met were never taught how to date. So let me, as a dating coach, ask you these questions now that you know this information, 

  • What do you want to do? 
  • Would you like to learn how to date?
  • Would you like to learn how to lean into what feels good for you, what feels good in your body, how to recover from rejection, how to stop your self-sabotage? 
  • How to recognize and pinpoint your limiting beliefs and learn how to rewrite them? 
  • Would you like to learn how to completely throw away the dating apps? 
  • Would you like to learn how to make organic, incredible connections in real life? 
  • Would you like to learn how to figure out who you want to date, what your standard should be?
  • Would you like to learn how to do that?

Because that’s where the magic happens. 

That is why I’m called to serve as a dating and relationship coach. When you work with me whether it’s in one of my exclusive one on one containers, or whether it is in the Ready for Love group coaching program. (That is going to start again in August.) If you want to go from where you are now, stuck in feelings of frustration, to feeling empowered and fearless, finally knowing what feels right in your body and, attracting incredible men who are there to support you and romance you. If you want to have the courage and the confidence to know where to go and attract those types of incredible men and partners. You can experience this love that you think seems to be eluding you just because you don’t know how to date. 

Help! Dating in Your 40s is Scary and Nobody Taught Me How to Date

How working with a dating coach will help.

That is where working with a dating coach can come in and better support you on your journey to finding love. That’s the beauty of coaching that I love. Because the incredible work that you’re going to learn with a dating coach is going to expedite the process. You’re going to have a guide, someone who knows how to do this, someone who has been working at this for almost a decade, someone who has gone through all the certifications. 

I can step up where other people were never able to help you before. I can help you find the love that maybe up until this point you feel has been eluding you. You will be able to walk away with the ability to know how to attract incredibly secure men who are going to make you believe in love again and who are going to give you love and respect and affirmation. You deserve that. 

So you don’t know how to date and you feel that’s what’s holding you back. So this is my challenge for you. I am extending this invitation to you. Now is the time to learn how. And now’s the time to figure out how to do that. So you’re no longer frustrated, and you’re no longer using that as an excuse for staying on your ass and not taking hold of your own love life. 

So now’s the time for you to say, “You know what? Yes, dating in your 40s is scary and nobody taught me how but who cares? I am ready to throw away all the bullshit excuses. I’m ready to work because I know I deserve incredible love. Show me how to get it because I know I fucking deserve that.” 

Help! Dating in Your 40s is Scary and Nobody Taught Me How to Date

When was the last time you did something for you? 

I’m not talking about you, the mother. Or you, the career woman. You, the ex-wife. Or you, the widow, or you, the dutiful daughter.

I’m asking when the last time was that you did something just for you: the whole-ass, badass individual you are.

If it’s been a while, (like, 30 years awhile), I want you to know you’re not alone.

That’s why, now is the time to book your discovery call with me. 

Because in just 30 minutes, you are going to have complete clarity on what you need to do next, and where it’s going to work for you the best in these next steps. You will actually learn how to date. The love of your life is out there waiting for you. Let’s go find them. So go ahead and book your discovery call with me!


Coach Martha 

Ps. If you wanted to watch the video related to this topic, check it out on my YouTube!